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The Blessings of being a loser

I find it pretty interesting that most guys in this community, or guys who aren't successful with women in general… tend to get real mad about the card they've been dealt in life. They look at the cool (ussually from a richer family) kids get all the girls without having to have involved any effort into it. And even when you look back on it from an adult perspective it feels just SO goddamn unfair!

Why do I have do to do all this stuff? Why do I have read books, crash and burn, go to seminars and improve week by week only to get to what these cool guys have always had effortlessly? And why do they have it? Simply because at the most critical part of life, when dating skills are formed in those 2-3 months in elementary school, they simply had a natural advantage, such as status or being the best-looking kid at the moment. So they GOT it… they got it… they got it for life.

And here you are, investing 10 times as much effort, just to get 10% of what he has. It feels unfair, and useless doesn't it?

Depends on the way you view it.

Personally I have changed my perspective into believing and feeling with all my heart that this situation is actually a blessing. It actually is a blessing.

WHY?

The first time you're out with some friends (who are skeptical and naysayers about learning this stuff), and you approach a stunning looking girl, right in front of them, on the street, and get her number in less than 5 minutes… You will get certain reactions and comments from them that will make you realize something interesting.

What they have is what they have… The skill level they have is the one they're stuck with… for life, it's almost as unchangeable as their height. If they were getting about one (average-looking) girlfriend every 9 months… guess what? That's what they're going to be getting for life. But to backtrack a little.

A few days ago I was in a very approachy-mode… I talked to quite a few people, and actually approached the most stunning girl I have ever seen in my life, I mean… she was so stunning that all people (girls included) were all literally turning heads to look at her when she walked by. Well, about 15 minutes after this experience I ran into a few greek tourists and start chatting with them… Lo and behold they mentioned being in Zagreb… so I imediatelly commented on how beatifull the women there are… and they ofcourse agreed, so I asked them if they met any…

The answer… was very telling… they looked at each other, frowned and said "nah, they're all just for the looking" why? "Well they're all stuck-up bitches", how do you know what, did you talk to them? Ofcourse they didn't, it was just a protective mechanism on their part that told them all stunning girls are stuck up (which I found amusing and chuckled, as I had just talked to just that kind of a girl 15 minutes previously). So as I proceeded to tell them about our community and the guys we have in belgrade who open these girls, all the time… they imediatelly went into mock-mode…

Mock-mode is what you will find amongst 99% of the population when you mention the community. It is a protective mechanism built to protect their fragile masculine ego from learning that it's possible to be better, to change. What's funny is it always happens the same way, whether you talk to a total geek or a "cool guy", whether he's from africa, the balkans or the u.s.a. Their cheeks get red, their eyes freeze (it almost looks like their head is going to start smoking), and they say something like "hahah those guys should come to me to see what real FUCKING is like" or "Dude, that's one huge scam, you know what you need to get the girls… MONEY, all women go for the money!" or "What do they do, increase your dick size? Muahahahah!" or "what do they do, give you tactics how to get the hookers cheaper? muahahahha"

All of this is ofcourse done with a macho tone of a dick-measuring magnitude, and is ussually done by guys who a) have one ugly girlfriend every 2-3 years or b) couldn't approach a pretty girl if you put a gun to their head, in short, your average guy of today.

Further, if you actually confront them with the facts such that they just saw you get the phone number of a stunning girl, and previously you couldn't even talk to average girls in your social circle or class in school… they will literally freeze… their eyes will wonder off and be put into an instant trance or they will mock you that "well she was just playing, when you call her she'll ask what kinda car you drive and dump you on the spot".

The point is… we all have (unless we were born in a tribe somewhere) very very powerfull built-in protective mechanisms that are put in their to preserve our sexual identity where it is. If it were possible to change our skill, that would be quite scary, frightening even as it would mean something must be wrong with us as men, if we don't have enough success, we must not be "man enough".

Which is why average guys will believe that all factors of success with women are external, outside themselves and unchangeable… "it's just the way it is… it's not my fault"… it allows them to not take responsibility for their position in life. If hot women only go for models and super-rich men, there's nothing I can do.

What's even more interesting is that they will totally block out any examples of the contrary. They will literally NOT see when a stunning babe walks by with an average guy, or when a rich girl they know will marry a poor guy (ofcourse many times they will say he must have a huge dick to rationalize it out)… There's nothing they can do, so long as it's not their fault, it's just the way things are.

So what does all of this have to do with being "a loser"? It means you have one huge advantage, and that is that you were hopeless enough to believe… you were hopeless enough to type into a search engine (how do I get women?), further you were hopeless enough to actually believe there is a way to change and get better, for long enough to read a few tips and articles… you HAD to believe, since if this doesn't work, you're doomed for life, you must believe that there is a way to change. And if you believe enough to keep reading, and seeing all the thousands upon thousands who've transformed, you decide to go try it out… and what happens? You get results! You actually get results! You try some more techniques, and you get even more results.

And THIS is the magical point… As… the moment at which you learn that it's actually possible to change your dating skills, it goes from impossible to possible, and at that point EVERYTHING changes… now all of a sudden everything is possible.

Because average or cool guys have such huge protective mechanisms that they will never ever ever even look at a site dealing with the issue, not even in the privacy of their home when no-one is watching!!! If you give them a short video of say a seminar where guys did these things live, they will refuse to watch it and find all kinds of excuses and rationalizations to never even look at it.

Back to the greek toursits… what's further insteresting is that when I was with them, I realized one peculiar thing… these were "cool guys", these were the type of guys I was jealous at just 3-4 years ago. Yet *I* changed and today I have 5 times the skills I had back then, and so I can look down on them (in pity). They were never motivated to change… having sex about 2-3 times a year with average girls (who chose THEM) is comforting enough to never seek out this path, they will be at that level for the rest of their lives! And they never will change…

Me? (and everyone else in the community) we have all experienced growth, and once you see it's possible to change, everything seems possible. If you learn how to get from a total loser to having 5-6 somewhat attractive girls a year, than all of a sudden getting to 2 HOT girls a month seems feasible and just a matter for learning some more skills. And when you reach that, having a different stunning girl each night doesn't seem like too far stretched… because you've experienced change, you know the deal, you know it's just a few skills and practiced consistently in the real-world. You get hooked on change.

And this is actually where you even have advantage over the natural seducer, the kind of a guy who's always been able to get any kind of a girl, anywhere since he was a child, without even knowing why or learning it.

Why? Because he doesn't know how he got it, he himself thinks it's just something unchangeable (oh it must be that they like my voice, oh it must be my lucky shirt). But further, (and this is a lot more valuable)… he hasn't gotten the skill of change. The guy who however had to struggle to get there has gotten an invaluable and most precious gift… the gift of change. Once you see you can change this, you can change anything. The skills you acquire in this journey will serve you in all areas of life… business, family-life, networking, hobbies, personal development, fitness. Whilst the natural can't transfer this into any other area, he just fucks better girls more often, but he's just as fat, depressed and unfullfilled as the rest of the world.

These understandings have made my perspective on things a lot more rewarding, and I hope they do the same for you as being gratefull and counting your blessings always gives you a very advantegous attitude, which is a must in seducing women. A lot better in any case than complaining and being bitter about having had no luck and having to learn all this.

A.L.E.K-N.O.V.I

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